To Grandmother's House We Go

Spring has brought an influx of home buyers. Today we had an open house from 1-4, but also had a showing 1230-130 and 430-530. So we decided to take the boys to my Grandma's Condo. I can't remember exactly the last time I'd been there, but it was sometime in high school. It was really weird to go back with my children. One of our favorite things to do growing up was to go swim at the complex's indoor pool. I was so excited to share that with my kids. Tobin, fearless as ever, tried to jump right into the pool. He had a blast. Hunter was always so nervous, Tobin is nothing like that. He would have swam off on his own if he could have. Hunter had fun too, since he is now in swim lessons, and is no longer required to have floaties on.

As I was changing back into my clothes I looked into the mirror, and tried to "flashback" to my childhood. I have issues with longing for my past, so I am constantly trying to remember things as if it were happening again. For some reason I just couldn't picture my 12 year old self looking at herself in that mirror. Then it hit me. When I was 12, I didn't care about looking in the mirror, I was too busy trying to hurry up and move on to the next thing. 12 year old Leah didn't care that her breasts weren't big enough, and her thighs were too big. She just wanted to run and play. I wish I could call that back to my mind. I wish that every little detail of my life becomes this huge weight to the point where it is hard to get off the couch. Why as we get older, does everything become a bigger deal? Why can we no longer just let things go, or concentrate on the next fun thing we get to do? As children we can not wait to grow up, because adults can do whatever they want. Although, there is a certain level of responsibility, especially as a parent; why, as adults, are we not doing whatever we want? Why are we letting down our child self. If our inner child could see how we were living, would we be jealous, or disappointed? Right now, my inner child would be disappointed. It is said quite often, but we really could learn a lot from our children.

I wish I had swimming pictures, but our camera is broken. Hopefully we get a new one soon, because Tobin is changing so much every day, and Hunter is looking more and more like a big kid every time I blink.